Thursday, July 10, 2008

Lady Elaine Fairchilde: A Tribute



Lady Elaine Fairchilde of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood fame is possibly one of the greatest characters to ever grace a children's show. Sure, she was a total bitch, appeared to have a drinking problem, and was quite possibly a drag queen, but that's what added to her awesomeness. Plus, some of her mannerisms remind me of my late grandmother (mostly when she called people "Toots").

Lady Elaine inhabited the infamous museum-go-round, which was undoubtedly the coolest residence in the Neighborhood of Make Believe. Her museum was full of jacked items, which she referred to as a "found items exhibit".

Lady Elaine was notorious for being a real shit disturber. Some of her finest moments include dissing Prince Tuesday's drawing of King Friday, making light of Daniel Striped Tiger's wussiness, convincing Prince Tuesday that his parents might abandon him, causing mischief with her Boomerang Toomerang Zoomerang, and just being generally pessimistic. If this show wasn't for kids, she totally would have made fun of Mr. McFeely's name.

While the other characters bowed down to King Friday ("correct as usual, King Friday"), Lady Elaine never put up with his crap. She didn't even call him "King Friday", he was just "Friday" to her. Fight the power, Lady Elaine!

...Wow, it just NOW dawned on me that King Friday's full name is King Friday the Thirteenth. I can't believe it took me almost 25 years to pick up on that.

Ohmigod, I so want this.

To cap this entry off, here are some verbal gems from our favorite alcoholic tranny:

"You mean you're not supposed to walk into somebody's private place and flash your flashlight around and scare them and say 'Yoo-hoo, I'm here!'"

"I have established a blanket policy at the factory: anyone who makes a mistake gets a spanking."

"My theory is that men can't dance."

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I still have nightmares about that puppet.

Anonymous said...

the creepiest fucking puppet ever!!i couldnt figure out if it was male or female.she had a girl name but looked like a boy!!!!

Anonymous said...

I loved lady Elaine fairchilde!! Still do!! 35 yrs later!! She was a total beotch-I loved it at 5yrs old and still do at 41!! Lady Elaine for president!!

CHARLES222 said...

Linked to this from Cracked...I laughed so hard I started crying :p of course she's an alcoholic!

Great post.

Anonymous said...

Cracked brought me here to

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Anonymous said...

she looked and acted like my mother-in-law, once referred to my a kid I knew as "the human lady Elaine." Lady Elaine herself should be insulted.

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